Charmed Quotes

[~*Alicia*~]

Cole: We're so screwed.
Phoebe (Scrying): Not yet.
Leo (orbs in): They have no idea where she is.
Phoebe: OK, now we're screwed.

[Cara Halliwell]

uh actually, PIPER says that. not cole.

[~*Alicia*~]

Thanks as far as I could rememeber it was Cole, but thanks.

[power3or4]

warlock: This games over

phoebe: (shimmers in)I couldn't agree more (kills demon turns to look in the screen) see what happens when you try to make a play for our baby? whats the matter? you scared of me? well are you? are you?

[xoFeliciaFinleyxo]

Here's one of my favorites.

Piper: Okay look, I don’t need to take a breath. I need to find my husband! (She hangs up. She breathes heavily and starts going upstairs.) Oh god. Someone please help me. (She collapses on the floor. She stands up and starts walking up the stairs. She looks down to see her body.) Oh no. Am I dead again?

(Cole is standing nearby.)

Cole: No. Well, not yet anyway.

(He smiles. Piper goes over to Cole.)

Piper: I don’t know which is worse – the fact that I’m dying or that, apparently, I’m gonna be spending my last dying moments with you.

Cole: I’d say that’s what you should be worried about. You’re not looking so hot. (He smiles.) What?

Piper: What? Don’t what me, Cole. What are you doing here?

Cole: You called for me.

(Piper chuckles.)

Piper: I didn’t call for you.

Cole: You asked for help. Here I am.

Piper: Like hell. You’re the answer to my prayers? I don’t think so. That’s just plain…

(Phoebe and Paige rush downstairs. Drake follows.)

Phoebe: Piper?

Paige: Oh my god!

(They shake her.)

Phoebe: Piper! Piper, wake up!

Paige: Piper!

(Piper waves her arms.)

Piper: Yoo-hoo guys. Hi. Over here.

Cole: They can’t hear you.

Paige: Oh my god.

Cole: Or see you.

Paige: The thorn demon. I know I should have had Leo heal her.

Phoebe: Or maybe it’s the shock of losing Leo?

Drake: Or maybe both.

(Piper waves her arms.)

Piper: Guys, yoo-hoo! Look, really, over here. Watch.

(She tries to knock over the lamp, but her hand goes through.)

Cole: Nice try.

Piper: Shut up.

Drake: Ran into a few of these thorn demons myself. (He snaps his fingers and Piper’s body appears in his arms.) Those pricks can be vicious. Pun intended. The poison works slowly, but it’s also fatal.

(He puts Piper’s body on the couch.)

Phoebe: Wait. Fatal? Okay, I don’t see any other choice. We’re gonna have to call the Elders to heal her.

Piper: Over my dead body!

Paige: Are you kidding? Piper will kill us!

Phoebe: At least she’ll be alive!

Paige: But if it’s slow working, that’ll give us time. Maybe we can have some sort of options or something.

Phoebe: You know what? I hate this. I feel so out of control, like there’s nothing that we can do.

Drake: There’s something we can do. All right? We gotta find Leo.

Paige: Except he can’t help us anymore.

Drake: Actually, he’s the only one who can. You weren’t paying attention to my little love rant. That’s exactly what we’re dealing with here.

Phoebe: Are you saying she’s lovesick?

Piper: That’s ridiculous!

Drake: Yeah. And it could kill her. Happens all the time to the bereaved after they lose a loved one. Even if we heal Piper, she still needs Leo.

Cole: Pay attention. He could be onto something.

Piper: What do you know?

Paige: Okay, uh, maybe you and I should go down to see Darryl and help speed this whole thing up.

Piper: Unh, people, come on. It’s a poison thorn. Could somebody please go check the book?

Drake: I think I’m going to check the, uh, book upstairs, see what I can do for Piper down here.

Phoebe: Call us if she gets worse.

(Drake runs upstairs.)

Drake: Don’t worry. Love will conquer all!

(Phoebe and Paige begin to leave.)

Cole: What beauty. She doth teach the torches to burn bright.

(Phoebe walks back and looks.)

Paige: What?

(They see nothing.)

Phoebe: Nothing.

(They leave.)

Piper: Since when do you quote Shakespeare?

Cole: It’s a recent affliction, actually. But the demon is right, you know. It is all about love.

Piper: What are you exactly? Ghost, demon, poltergeist, nightmare?

Cole: None of the above. We’re caught in a cosmic void…between life and death.

Piper: I’m stuck with you?

Cole: No. If you play your cards right, you can get out of this nasty limbo. I’m the one who’s here for all eternity.

Piper: Paying penance for your evil past.

Cole: You always were the smart one.

Piper: Cut the crap.

Cole: And direct. I miss that. Actually no, I don’t.

Piper: Can you please just tell me what you’re doing here?

Cole: Simple. I’m here to help keep you and Leo together.

Piper: Right.

(She walks away. Cole appears.)

Cole: I’m trying to do a good deed here, make sure that you don’t end up like me, and this is the thanks I get.

Piper: I know what you’re doing. This is just a ploy to break out of your ungodly plane and back into our lives. See? I’m right.

Cole: I’ll be the first to admit I’m not above having an ulterior motive.

Piper: Exactly.

Cole: But I’m here for one reason and one reason only: To help you find your love while you still can.

[Scene: Diner. Nadine’s. Leo is finishing up a piece of pie at the counter. Waitress (Nadine) walks up and takes his plate.]

Nadine: Well, looks like you worked up an appetite being the big hero this morning. You know what? Since it’s on the house, why don’t you try something a bit more substantial?

(Nadine pulls out the menu.)

Leo: No, this is amazing. I think it was the best pie I’ve ever had.

Nadine: Oh, you know what? I’d take that as a compliment except that you can’t remember tying your own shoelaces. You know what? I bet you have someone somewhere who cooks for you just fine, when it all comes back to you. Hmm? Oh, I’m sorry. I tend to stick my foot in it.

Leo: No, it’s-it’s okay. I just wish I could remember

(He wipes his mouth with a napkin.)

Nadine: It looks like you had a wedding ring on, huh?

Leo: Yeah, I-I guess.

[Flashback: Leo gets on his knees. He slips an engagement ring on Piper’s finger.]

[Present.]

Nadine: Maybe she dumped you.

Leo: What? No.

Nadine: Yeah, maybe she smacked you on the head with some cast iron for cheating on her and knocked you out. Wish I’d done that when I found my husband cheating on me.

(She chuckles.)

Leo: She didn’t dump me.

Nadine: Are you remembering something?

Leo: It’s just…a feeling.

(He hears a woman giggling. Leo sees a young couple in a booth. He turns to the TV to see a man and woman kissing.)

[Scene: Police Department. Paige is sitting behind the desk, talking on the phone. Phoebe is writing across from her.]

Paige: (To phone) Yes. Amnesia. He doesn’t remember a thing. His family’s getting desperate. Yeah, we’ll send a photo right over. Thank you. (She hangs up.) Well, a hundred and fifty police stations down and another ba-jillion to go. It’s like searching for the proverbial needle in a haystack.

Phoebe: I know it’s daunting, but we can’t give up hope.

Paige: I’m thinking maybe that Elder didn’t want us to.

Phoebe: What are you saying?

Paige: I think she was trying to say something to us or at least tell Piper something. Why would she tell Piper not to give up hope if all hope is already lost?

Phoebe: So you think it’s some kind of test?

Paige: Well, if it is, it’s one we’d better pass.

(Darryl walks over with a file.)

Phoebe: Hey. Any luck?

Darryl: Well, besides the John Doe that you two found matching Leo’s description, you know, my guys have come up with two more so far.

Phoebe: Is there any way we could speed this up?

Darryl: I have as many men as I can on it without drawing suspicion from Sheridan.

(An officer walks over, handing Darryl a file.)

Officer: This looks like something you might want to see. John Doe just saved some guy’s life in Texas.

[Scene: Nadie’s. Leo steps out. He sees a big rig. It has a California sign on the front. The driver steps out. It’s the Male Elder.]

Male Elder: Can I help you?

Leo: I don’t know. Maybe. Are-are you going to San Francisco?

Male Elder: Want a ride?

Leo: Sure.

Male Elder: Well, hop in.

Leo: Thanks.

(He and Male Elder gets in.)

[Time lapse. The big rig drives out.]

[Scene: Manor. Attic. Drake is looking through the Book of Shadows.]

Drake: You got to have a remedy in here somewhere. Now, come on, damn it! (He hits the book. It flies to the floor.) Sorry. Sorry. Let a little bit of the old demon slip out there. Won’t happen again. (He reaches for the book, but it flies away. Drake crawls toward the book.) Come on, would you? I… (He notices the page and pulls the book onto his lap.) Tips for future Whitelighters? (Drake sits and puts the book in his lap.) “To my sons Wyatt and Chris.” Future Whitelighters, eh?

(He reads the page.)

[Cut to living room. Cole sits on a chair.]

Cole: Stubbornness is definitely a family trait. (He picks up a photo of Phoebe.) You’ve tried going upstairs twice, out the front door four times, and through the wall five… (Piper gets thrown out of the wall and across the room.) Make that six times. But hey, you haven’t tried the chimney yet.

(Piper gets up.)

Piper: I thought ghosts could go any damn place they pleased.

------The Seven Year Witch.

[•|CharmedS678|•]

A quote I like is from All Hell Breaks Loose.

I don't remember it that great, but I know that some girl from their highschool is being interviewed, and she accuses Prue of casting a spell to break her and her boyfriend up, and as Piper and Prue watch it on tv. Prue looks angry, and Piper stares at it blankly with the line "I always wondered why they broke up."

[iamthesun]

a few I liked..


Piper: What would I do without you?
Phoebe: Oh, suffer endlessly, no doubt.

(Darryl reaches to touch Piper’s stomach)
Darryl: If you ask me, there’s nothing more beautiful than a preg—
Piper: Do it and you pull back a bloody stub.

Phoebe: So, how ‘bout those 9ers?
Cole: The what?
Phoebe: The 9ers? The 49ers? The football team? …You don’t follow football? (laughs) He isn’t human.
(Cole chokes on his water)

Piper: Uh, wow, I-I don't think a witch is allowed to marry a demon. Honey, we can 't have a demon in the family.

[Chrisaholic]

Still a lovely one:

Chris: What? I'm being ridiculous? There is a demon in the playpen. -----from "Little Monsters"